Narcissism is a term that is increasingly used to describe one’s excessive focus on one’s self. We speak of a narcissistic personality as a person who always views what is happening in terms of how it affects that person. In essence, the world, even the universe, revolves around that person. I, me, my are the most used words in a person’s vocabulary.
I want to suggest that a major problem we face in our ministry and in our congregations is a version of narcissism. A pastor can become too focused on how the events at the church, the behavior of the session, or the structure of presbytery affects him or her personally. They don’t provide me enough salary. I’m not free to preach what I believe. They don’t appreciate that I am working 70 hours a week. Going to presbytery meetings is a waste of my time. In parallel fashion, members of a congregation can also become narcissistic. We see it in members who say they are leaving a congregation because “it doesn’t meet my needs.” Or I don’t like it when the sermon contradicts what I believe. The pastor didn’t visit me when I was in the hospital.
In addition, however, I want to suggest that a congregation as a body can become narcissistic and begin to see everything revolving around how it affects them. We need to change pastors and get one who can attract more young members. What right does presbytery have in telling us what we can do with our building? It is important that we not act in a controversial way because we can’t afford to offend our biggest pledgers.
If you begin with the self or the congregation as the center of the universe, all three of these thought patterns might make sense. However, consider how such an attitude contradicts the central beliefs of the Christian faith. If our thoughts and actions are shaped by the admonition that we have the same mind that was in Christ Jesus (Philippians 2:5) who emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, and became obedient (to God) even to the point of death, consider how we might behave differently.
