I want to pursue this idea of the importance of being open to receiving support in your ministry. There are far too many clergy and educators who misunderstand the witness that they can make by being willing to receive support and appreciation from others in ministry. How often have you found yourself stammering or even dismissing a compliment given to you.
“You did a fantastic job in guiding the congregation through that difficult congregational meeting, pastor.”
“Oh, it wasn’t that big a deal.”
Think how dismissing the person’s compliment also dimishes the person offering it.
Maybe a better response would be, “Thanks. I’m glad to get your response. Knowing how I come across to others is really important to me.”
Now you have not only received the compliment graciously but also honored the one who gave it.
It needs to be recognized that there is an important form of ministry that takes place when you ask others to help you. I’m not talking about a pastor asking someone to serve on a committee. That can also be important but I am talking about asking someone to help you specifically. “This meeting is very important but I didn’t get much sleep last night, could you possibly drive me to the meeting?”
Sometimes in asking for help, you help the person you ask reflect on their own life as well. “I know that you have a demanding job as well. Could you help me understand how you balance your time with family and keep up with your professional responsibilities.”
Many people in our congregations have gifts that would help us and would feel good about sharing them if they were asked. Maybe a way to gain perspective is to recall the feeling of satisfaction that you received when you were able to help someone with a problem that the had. I recall several times in my ministry when I just happened to have the right word or action that helped someone in a difficult moment and feeling gratitude afterwards that God had called me to that moment. Not only did it help that person but it helped give value to my life as well. So if that is so good for us, why are we reluctant to offer that same feeling of satisfaction to another person?
We need to reflect more on the ministry of asking others for help.
