A challenge for ministry is that frequently you are asked to hear and respond to other people’s pain, then drink in that pain, but it doesn’t seem appropriate to acknowledge your own pain because it was the other person who had the initial trauma. As we have mentioned, the effect of mirroring another person’s pain does have it’s stress on your own body. Yet, since rationally it doesn’t seem to be your pain but that of others, the result is a sense of isolation. Pain tends to isolate a person anyway and sympathetic pain derived from caring for another can isolate even more.
An antibody for this condition is to intentionally act to maintain your connectivity with others. A spiritual director or counselor is one path because in that situation, you can even share some of the cause of your stress in a confidential context. More on that later.
Having a small group of pastors that you meet with regularly can be another means of maintaining a supportive atmosphere for your ministry. While you may not share confidential details in such a group, you can share the general feelings of stress in the ministry among such a group. In the process you are inviting them to do the same, which results in a mutually beneficial experience.
Having some friends that you can regularly engage in fun social activities outside the ministry can also help you de-stress. This is not a casual extra but an important part of maintaining your health in ministry. It should be intentional and be scheduled so that it becomes a regular part of your life experience. For some people, this is the reason for getting season tickets to a sport or entertaining venue.
In another blog, we will reflect on the importance of being intentional in your spiritual practices as a means of maintaining that aspect of your community that includes God.