THE POWER OF APPRECIATION
Most human beings hunger for signs that people appreciate them and what they do. I always found that writing an occasional note of appreciation for someone who had shared their gifts with the church paid big dividends. Imagine what might happen if you could start a movement in your congregation where people were expressing appreciation in numerous and unexpected ways. I suggested a similar idea in my last blog as applied to clergy relating to other clergy. Now I want you to picture the impact on the member of your congregation.
LOVING SELF AND NEIGHBOR
Look at your membership rolls, and identify a diverse selection of individuals. I would suggest that you include both males and females, both young and elderly. I think this would be especially powerful if you would include at least one teenager and one elementary age child. Don’t start out with too large a group so that the task and expense become a barrier. (See below for some suggestions in those areas.)
Prayerfully reflect on these individuals and identify something positive about them. It might be something they do, or it might be the nature of their personality. Write a brief note to each of them, thanking them for sharing their gifts to the ministry of the church. For example, you might say, “I appreciate the grace with which you greet people and make them feel welcome.” Or “I want to thank you for being such a regular participant in the youth group (or singing in the choir.) Again, it may be what they do or how they relate to others, etc.)
My assumption is that the note alone will have a strong impact, but there is a second surprise. Enclose in each envelope a fresh ten-dollar bill. Tell them that the ten dollars is to be spent exclusively on themselves. They can rent a movie and buy some popcorn. They can have an ice cream sundae or some other treat. Explain that the great commandment is that you should love your neighbor as yourself and this is a time to express love for the self God created you to be.
Particularly to the adults, suggest that after they have had this experience of loving self, they might want to identify another person or so in the congregation and provide a similar experience for them. It is always supposed to be an instance of “play it forward,” and not a return gesture of thanks.
THREE ADDITIONS TO CONSIDER
First with respect to the expense of this experiment in progressive friendship, you might want to consider making use of the next honorarium you receive to fund this project.
Second, my guess is that your action will create a very positive buzz in your congregation. You might consider an extension of this experience by asking members of your official board to consider choosing two or three people for their own notes of appreciation.
At the beginning, try not choosing obvious leaders in the congregation for the first round or so. Let some people who are less visible in the congregation experience the power of gratitude in their lives.
Above all, have fun and enjoy the lively conversation that may result as people share what they did with their ten dollars.
