OFFERING OUR GIFTS
Now comes the hard part. Over the years we have prayed, “Forgive us our debts (or trespasses) as we forgive our debtors (those who trespass against us.) We read in the Scriptures that if we are at the altar and there remember that someone has something against us, we are to leave our gift at the altar, go and be reconciled, and then return and offer our gift. (Matt 5:23) Prayer and worship are at the heart of our ministry. If we take either Jesus teaching about prayer or Matthew’s admonition about worship seriously, it is a good thing that God’s grace triumphs over righteousness.
Our coming to terms with past hurts is an important part of the future development of our unity with God. It is not that God has some scoreboard keeping track of our past, but it is that our soul is weighed down by these less than perfect interactions. If they have all been pressed down, they become like toxin that robs us of the strength to fully live our life.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT EASY
We have told others but now, as we conclude this chapter in our journey, it is time for us to come to terms with the radical concept of forgiveness. In many cases forgiveness is as much for the forgiver as it is for the forgiven. We forgive those who have offended us to make space in our souls to receive the forgiveness that God offers us.
You have your list of life incidents that you have composed. Hopefully you have given yourself permission to be totally honest as to the feelings that these incidents generated in your life.Now review your list and pick out the two or three that most stand out for you.
RELEASING YOUR HURT TO GOD
Take one of these incident and examine it in more detail. Whether to a counselor or in prayer, describe in as much detail as possible exactly what happened, how it made you feel then, and how it makes you feel now. If you were to turn those feelings over to God, how might God make use of the energy behind your experience to generate a new possibility for your future. Invite God to heal you for a purpose.
When you can make meaning out of your experience, you will be fee to let it go. You are now in retirement but God still has purpose for your life. It is out of your past that God generates meaning for your future.
BUILDING YOUR PLATFORM
When I was nearing retirement, a good pastoral friend asked me who I was going to be in retirement. He explained that in the past I had identified myself as a pastor of this or that church. Now when someone asked me who I was, how was I going to respond.
Your platform of identify can incorporate how God has spoken to you through your past experience. When it does, all those hurts, small and large, are no longer wasted. They are the earth into which God has planted new seeds. Examining those difficult incidents in your past and turning them over to God is like generating fertilizer for what can now grow.
